5 weeks 1 day

Last night I fell asleep super early. I have been so tired lately. Thankfully so far I have been able to make it through the days without a nap but then around 8 o'clock I can't keep my eyes open for one minute more and I am done for the night.

I also wake up starving! I haven't even woken my kids up yet and I made myself french toast. LOL! I have gained back 2 of the 4 lbs that I lost. Oh well...we'll worry about weight loss in October. : )

So far so good. I still can't believe that I am pregnant. Its going to take some getting used to. My husband called me fertile myrtel because we didn't even think this month was a possiblity and in all honestly I wasn't actively trying to get pregnant. Once our insurance kicked in in November we knew that it would be ok if we got pregnant and I just decided to sit back and let it happen for once in my life. I was obsessed about trying to get pregnant. And here we are 2 months later and expecting a new little one.

I can't wait to see boy or girl. Emma says she thinks its twins...hahaha! She told me she has been praying to Jesus for a long time for twins...a boy for Ethan and a girl for her. I wouldn't doubt God answering her prayer since I think He has a sweet spot for children's requests, but at the same time it's not likely so if it were two babies what an amazing blessing that would be.
I have always wanted 4 kids, but because of my need for c-sections that's not going to be possible. The doctor told me I was healthy enough to have 4 or 5 sections but I myself don't feel comfortable with that.
I would love to have another boy and girl, but God knows best. I already have one of each so I really don't have a preference at all. I would love for Emma to have a sister, but at the same time I would like for Ethan to have a brother so whatever we get will be just perfect for our family. Now if only I could think of a name : )

Why is it so hard to get men to agree on a name? I don't understand. Phil said he is over "E" names and that's ok with me. We never intended on naming all of our kids with one letter it just so happened that these were the names we liked when I was pregnant with Emma. Phil doesn't like to talk about names until well after we know the sex. Me, I am a planner and I want to know now. hahaha. Even though I don't know what the child is I like going in there knowing that its named.
To me pregnancy is such an amazing thing. I can't wait to feel the baby move. I love having people feel it squirm and kick. I love knowing that for this one special time in my life God is actually working physically within me. What a profound mystery and miraculous event. My husband on the other hand gets freaked out when the baby moves. He doesn't like to feel it kick...he doesn't really connect until that little one enters the world. Then he is all tears and super protective. I had my sister and his sister with me when Emma was delivered. I saw Emma but had to be sewn up and brought back to the room. Meanwhile Phil and Emma went upstairs without me to be checked out. They were in the room when I got there. But because I never got to hold my baby, Phil would not let anyone else touch her (except him) until I got to hold her. Very sweet.
So he has it in him, I just wish he could be more like the dads who talk to the baby and like to feel it move, but we can't have it all now can we.

It's 7:45 and I have been up for an hour and I feel like I am ready for a nap at this point. I better go check up on Emma and see how she's doing. Until next time.